Attending a choreographed event with a pre-conceived outcome isn’t unusual. Take ballet, for example. Those ghost-like feints across the stage, the purest moments of this art form, draw from partner-required practice before being cultivated into a skill—and we appreciate it.
Perhaps that explains why, in spite of itself, wrestling is still so popular. It’s not “real” in the sporting sense (you knew that, right?), but not fake either.
Seen the movie "The Wrestler?" In it, Mickey Rourke does a signature move called “The Ram.” Standing upright on a corner buckle, he flies through the air, managing to wedge a sweaty head between thick, spandex-clad thighs before crashing to the canvas. Grace, strength, bravery and innate ability—just like ballet.
In other words, don’t be embarrassed to attend Monday’s WWE Raw event. Savor it. Feast on the feuds, the heavy metal. Admire torsos chiseled with muscles the rest of us never knew existed.
But if your memory of wrestling’s protagonists is subjected to a little ring rust (it’s WWE now, not WWF, and The Rock is making movies these days), a little brushing up is required. Meet some of the characters:
Vince McMahon: Vilified for his ruthless, Gordon Gecko-type greed, Mr. McMahon is a major ingredient in the drama. He doesn’t wrestle, as such, but, apparently, meddles in the background, and usually on the side of the bad guys. In real life, he’s the creator of modern-day wrestling entertainment and has amassed a fortune in doing so.
John Cena: He’s currently the heavyweight champion and an all-round good guy. With clean-cut good looks, he’s the kind of role model the sport needs after some bad publicity. He was captain of his college football team and even holds a degree in exercise psychology (whatever that is).
Hacksaw Jim Dugan: Yep, after more than 30 years he’s still in the game. And he’s not changed a bit…well, apart from aging. He still brandishes a wood plank, which frequently finds itself on an opponent’s head. Part of his staying power is that he’s a vital bridge to the halcyon days of the sport, the '80s, which keeps Generation Xers coming to events.
Now for some tips that you'll find helpful at the event:
Picking a wrestler: OK, so Hulk Hogan’s not around anymore and you don’t know any of the current stars. Simple, just do what you did as a child—pick a couple based on your personal criteria and whittle it down to one.
Catch up on the storyline: The plot’s not exactly as complicated as "The Sopranos." Yet, you need to know what’s going on to appreciate it. Watching Saturday night’s WWE Smackdown will bring you up to speed on who hates whom and introduce the eclectic cast of characters ahead of Monday’s showdown.
Info
What: WWE Raw
When: 7 p.m. April 13
Where: Philips Arena
Cost: $24, $29, $34, $44 and $74
Call 404-249-6400 or visit www.ticketmaster.com and www.wwe.com.
